Maybe it is working

I think the increased Remicade helped.  My energy is up.  I started weaning Prednisone down from 30mg.

I am on 10 mg now and don't feel like it is enough...but I put on some weight in the past 6 weeks...my face blew up...bah.  My hip still hurts and my right foot and ankle swell everyday.  This right foot has been constant.  my left hand, 5th metatarsal is hurting daily too...that is new.  Been having pins and needles all down my back too.  Weird.

I have been feeling better, but better than it sucking is still not great.  I won't see my Rheumy for another 2 1/2 weeks, though I sent her an update message.  I have been tracking all of my symptoms, including the "new ones" so I can report to her.  Not sure what is next.  I am on the max methotrexate dose.  Bah, I don't feel like thinking about it.

I feel like all I do is complain.  Christy assures me that is not the case.

The invisibility of this is frustrating.  I think that is why I "liked" using my cane last week...it was something visible.  Not that I want to be seen as the disease, more that it makes it easier when there is an outward sign that I am in pain or not as able to do what I have been able to do in the past.

I keep telling myself I am going to do yoga, something to feel better about my body...then I don't do it.

I want to.  I felt better when I was doing it, even if it was only the easy "Teddy Bear" practice that is super gentle.  I just get home and crash.  I haven't really even been cooking dinner... Even though my energy is improved, I am so wiped out by the time I get home, so I throw on comfy clothes and crash on the couch.

I am trying.  I rested and napped over the long weekend, but we did hang out with my Aunt and Uncle and went out for dinner.  I am trying to be social.

I think I just bummed myself out!  Ha!  No...I am going to put on some energetic music and try to power through for a few more hours.

Peace.

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